A cold parting

The new year rolled in and frankly I didn't really feel it. It crept in through the back door, sneaked in sort of. There i was, making grandiose plans, rolling out the red carpet, preparing long resolutions...well i didnt actually get to doing any of those. The mist, fog and the nasty chill kept me busy. It's so so cold. How can your mind function in such numbness? I dont know which i hate more- the searing heat of Delhi summers or this brain numbing, pot seat freezing teeth rattling chill.
But when the sun does come out from behind the layers of grey clouds and fog, it feels like bliss. Just put your back to it and sun yourself to a toast and all is forgiven till darkness rolls in again. I was at Nigambodh Ghat the day before- my first visit to the famous cremation ground. A close friend's parent had passed away. Consciously or subconsciously i have kept myself at arm's length from such sensitive places. They scare the hell out of me. There's something very unsettling about them. This particular ground was decorated with colourful statues of Gods in chariots which looked rather terrifying. I mean, isnt there a better way to make a place cheerful? There was also a bit of a queue and a traffic jam of sorts. Dead people were actually waiting for their last rites to be performed and then taken into their numbered pyres. I think it can be quite overwhelming for someone who is already reeling under intense emotional strain and battling grief. The cold didn't help and the fumes from the burning pyres made it difficult to see or breathe. To top it all everyone was so serious and glumfaced. I think we need to address the way we say goodbye to folks. What's wrong with having peppy music and some warm comfortable places to sit? An option to have flowers and incense? A nice setting to evoke treasured moments spent with the lost one. With beauty comes good memories and that's what people want, dont they? To be remembered with love. 

Back with a wimper...

Guys, I've been playing truant again. Sorry about that. Since I'm poised in the new year and feeling all optimistic and brave I will make a declaration. I will be regular with my pen this year and promise to regale my loyal and discerning readers with a lot of funny and mostly harmless chit chat. It's been three years now since I've been blogging. (Has it really?) And though this blog never really took off the way i'd planned, it did give me an avenue to talk about things i care and feel strongly about. Three years is a long time and many things have changed in this period. I've lost the initial set of readers and gained some new ones. Technology has changed and I've progressed from a passive writer to a pushy one- I actually mail my posts to a lot of people, thus playing on their conscience not to hit the delete button and read my ramblings. Some of you are generous enough to comment and give feedback. (And i appreciate that) Some hit the delete button anyway! (UC, you're one of those shameless people). But i take it in my stride. My motto has been and will be: If you are taking somebody's time- it better be worth it!

So, here i am once again- with all goody goody intentions. I'll try and be more regular and spice up the page a bit. Any ideas are heartily welcome. Mail me the suggestions.

And have a great year!

New year resolutions are to be broken

What’s a new year’s eve without resolutions? For many people, resolutions are a ritual, a must have thing. They revel in it. Like ‘to do’ lists they’ll bravely jot down lofty promises. All very well. But do they manage to keep them? Admit it. We, each of us, have broken promises in life. So why not break resolutions? And without guilt? If just making them peps you up, helps you look forward to the New Year, then breaking them shouldn’t make you feel guilty. We know that eventually all resolutions come to a naught. By the end of January they will be forgotten and relegated to the waste bin of the brain. This year, be kind to yourself. Here’s why your old resolutions wont work.

Common resolution no. 1: I will lose weight and exercise. Scrap it off. Winters are the time for cuddling into your quilt if you live in a cold climate or sleeping in late on one of the year end holidays. But this resolution of ‘losing weight’ is tailor-made to rip your early morning snooze to shreds and drive a wedge through your dreams. I’ve got to lose weight and walk goes through your mind like a grating chalk on a blackboard and jars all the harmonic notes in your brain. Put an end to it. Tell yourself, I’ll start after a few days. Soon, very soon.

Resolution no. two: I will spend more time with my family..blah blah. It’s the perennial complaint. Daughters fight with mothers, wives and girlfriends complain of dwindling time spent and kids complain that their parents don’t take them out or spend time with them. But just for a second recall just why are you spending so little time with them? Because of your job, right? And if you didn’t work so hard then where would the money for all the fun come from? Would they want to spend time with a bickering, unhappy person? The truth is you’re working extra hard for your family. In a roundabout way you are actually spending time to make them comfortable. So you can water this resolution down a bit. I’m going to clock watch at work and head home at 6/6.30 for a change. I’m going to say to my boss: ‘itne mein itna hi hota hai!’

Resolution no. three: I will quit smoking and drinking- If you were really serious you would’ve done it a long time ago. Since you failed, you might as well stop and think why. So change it to: I’m going to think why I can’t seem to quit smoking and drinking. I will ask my family what to do and let them help me kick my habit (and not kick me).


Resolution no. four: I will learn a new language- Wont work unless it has to deal with technology. Learning a new language is useless unless you use it all the time. What’s the point of learning Spanish or German and forgetting it as soon as the classes are over? I suggest you learn to use the buttons on your mobile besides the green and the red buttons. Learn how to send an SMS and a business card. Learn to tweet and use the facebook. Learn to operate the remote of your hi-fi TV.

Resolution no. five: I will read more. But please be specific. Your reading list shouldn’t include e-mails, medicine bottle labels and the TV guide. You must read a book and magazines. And definitely not alongside a radio, ipod or a Twenty-twenty match on television.

My suggestions for resolutions:
1. I will not head for the mall everytime I take my family out. Instead, I’ll go to a park, the zoo, a museum or a movie.
2. I will not pretend take out burgers and pizza are the menu for ‘eating out’
3. I will look up at the sky at least once a day and thank God for the beautiful life he has given me.
4. I will not honk at the car in front of me. It could be my own father driving it.
5. When I’m on the net, I will control my urge to read gossip and catch up on the news instead.
6. I will not lie on facebook and pretend to be uber cool.

Go ahead. Make them and break them. At least you would’ve given it a try.